Everybody likes a good email. An entertaining youtube link, a passive aggressive note from an ex, a reply to your “missed connections” post on craigslist – all good things. But like any new technology, eventually it falls into the wrong hands. Enter Uncontrollable Chain Mail Forwarder, an evil spirit with no soul who prays on innocent email checkers. That’s right, a spirit with no soul.
So crooked is this messenger, she gets off on threatening your life. Do we want to pass on her virus? Of course not, but we do, because we fear if we don’t send it to ten more people. we’ll never find love, or have bad luck for 38 years, or a child in Africa will die.
Your games have gone on long enough, chain mail terrorist. The alert’s on orange and the next time we see your name followed by the letters FWD, we’re gonna respond with a different kind of letter. And it’s gonna include lots of paper cuts. In the face.
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Да,несогласен с предыдущими высказываниями
Споки Bye
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I have an Uncontrollable Text Message Chain Mail Forwarder cousin who’s 11!! Everytime I watch her I try to throw a FWD: punch to the face!
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In reply to “My Required Name”
I once received a love giving chainletter from a girl friend of mine real romantic.
replied with this subject “Less romantic, but quite funny”.
Attached, an image of a couple in I think mid seventies, both naked, women keeping an hen in her arm, the man having… Well you guess it… That image was so absurd, that you couldn’t totally blame me on it
Never received anymore spam from her, just “useful” mails
Met again this girl I knew when I was… 4 years old… I had nothing related to her, well, maybe I’m the only one, but I don’t really remember how was it at 4.
.
Anyway, I made a littre mistake: I gave her my main email address. Not the “Serious junk mail address” Neither the “Possibly not all junk” or “need a second chance email address…”. The main one, so now she tend to spam me everyday with a damm “This girl got kidnapped thing…”. And it seems that putting every addresses she has in “CC” doesn’t look impolite to her. Now I get direct spam from other people in her list. I’m doomed.
Last week I received something related to sim card (the chip in your mobile). The all text was plain dumb and pretending to be from government agency about identity forgery, hacking, uber billing…
Too bad for her, sim card is a subject I know(my bad, I’m a geek
Sim card don’t have super duper power, like making your phone blow up.
James bond class hacker won”t harm you much.
You could make cheap calls but not much more.
So, I replied nicely with appropriate documentation, and only to her. I didn”t want to make a fuss, just educate her about hoaxes she would spread.
The bitch never thanked me, never replied to it, and keeps sending me those damn shit.
So next time you meet a girl you knew when you were 4 years old:
- Ask for a picture first, rude but, makes sense since there’s good chances you have nothing in common except diapers. if you have to suffer those spam, at least think about a motivator
- Give a “junk mail address”, and give the right one, after a while if she acts correctly
- Any other proposition accepted
- All this is not women specific
My husband’s grandmother forwards chain mail to us constantly. We’ve set up our accounts to automatically recognize mail from her address as spam, and henceforth Grandma is known as Spam-ma.
Google Billy Connolly’s chain letter.
My father forwards everything he gets to everyone on his e mail list. Then, my sister, who is on his e mail list, forwards it to everyone on her e mail list so, I get it twice.
I don’t even open pps attachments anymore.
I love chain emails!
Gather all those addresses, email the “Goatse” pic (If you don’t know, Google is your friend) to EVERY one of them, and tell them –
“This picture is sent to you because I received your email address in a forwarded email.
Every time I get a forwarded email with a list of emails, a picture will be sent.
And they will only get worse from here.
Good luck, safe driving, and be careful out there.”
look at that smug bitch in the picture, man i wouldn’t mind knocking her fucking block off.
LMAO!! You tell ‘em. Something just as annoying and an eye soar? Those stupid random text messages from joke telephone lines as well as dumb fwd “pass it on” text messages. It makes me want to not have a cellphone =|
I get several from the uncontrollable PPS Forwarder myself. I love my aunt dearly, but don’t even think of opening a single one of ‘em.
I particularly hate the “If you love Jesus”; “If you’re not ashamed….” emails. No, I’m not ashamed. And I’m not ashamed to NOT pass this email on.
My mom always sends me things that truly are interesting, but she sends links to the sites as documents, so I have to download the freaking things.
I’m an email forwarding killer. I don’t for a second think that “God won’t think I love him” if I don’t forward the email, nor do I think that my mother will be murdered in the shower if I don’t forward the email.
If you want to send me a rose, call 1-800-Flowers and send me a real one.
I’ve got an Aunt with two daughters who foward the same emails to me. As each one of them gets it – they send it to everyone … never mind that I was on the FIRST list. Argh.
I got the most offensive religious chain mail piece of crap I’ve ever had the misfortune to open the other day. If I didn’t forward it, I was gonna burn in hell!
Something good came out of it… it inspired me to donate to the atheist bus campaign.
http://www.justgiving.com/atheistbus
@ Elaine : I hate those PPS attachments. They always open full screen on your desktop. Thank goodness for gmail and gdocs!
I have an Uncontrollable Chain Mail Forwarder aunt. I don’t read most of her e-mails.
And the Uncontrollable Chain Mail Forwarder has a twin brother/sister, the Uncontrollable PPS Forwarder, who junk our e-mail with cheesy PowerPoint documents. I hate those!